Wed 20th

I was thinking at work last night that I wish that I had kept this diary from the start – 4 years ago. How I have changed in that time. I remember having so many doubts and fears, also overconfidence at times in my salvation. I have backslided much during this time. Now there is (at this time) only peace and a quiet assurance within. I pray that many others could feel the way I feel, but one of my greatest weaknesses is in not having the courage to speak of my faith to those closest and most important to me. I did try 4 years ago, but know now that it was me trying to get them to believe, whereas I should have told the story of the gospel and prayed and left it in God’s hands.

back online

I have had no internet access for the last 2-3 weeks due to ISP problems, a faulty router and a call centre in India. It has finally been sorted out now, and my internet is back on. Orange sent me a new router and it works fine, however after 2 weeks without the web, it felt like a bit of a novelty again and I wasted a fair bit of time on it yesterday after work. There are resolutions that I am determined to work on;
1 – to update this daily, even if its only a line or two
2 – to keep my internet use to a minimum, not switching the pc on first thing when I get up either
3 – praying and reading the word of God more; I have noticed recently (especially when I didn’t have access to the web), that I spent more time in prayer and in daily reading of the bible and consequently I have had more inner peace, more awareness of His providence, more delight in Him and more revelatory thoughts. Looking back over this diary between the sparse entries at the beginning of the year and becoming more regular now, I put it down to one thing only – prayer. How important this is.
4 – not spending too much time or caring overly much on worldly pursuits